No Obligation

I have no obligation to like her or be her friend so i deleted it because that's just added stress that you know what? I don't have to care about. I don't care for her or about her and I don't like her. No obligation to be friends so I deleted her.

Deric loves me. That i what i need to remember always. I need to remember that although he is friends with her and can see slutty things hes still mine and if he wanted any of that stuff he would always come to me. Deric would never cheat on me. He would never hurt me. He wants to be with me even when I am a little psychotic, even when i yell and get angry over stupid things, even when we argue. we'll work out our issues and my problems together. I forget these things and i get upset. I get insecure and unhappy and get angry and yell at Deric. He's no lying to me or cheating on me or thinking about doing either and he knows that if anyone ever stepped over the boundary line he would immediately no longer be friends with them. We are going to be moving in with each other soon and  starting a very big step in our relationship. Deric seems to want to be with me for a long time and he wants to love me as much as he can and i mean the world to him. I am a very very important thing in his life and he is very committed to me as i am to him. I would NEVER do anything to jeopardize that and neither would he. I just have to get that through my thick skull and i have to realize that he would never let anyone else try or do anything so i just need to trust him even if i do not trust the people he is with. Deric is a smart person, he knows right from wrong, and he always has my best intentions when i am not around. As i have his, we know what the other would approve of and what they would not.

Lately I've been feeling clingy and I think it's just because of all the stuff i have been having anxiety about. I think my pills doing a little better because I don't feel as all over the place. So maybe the first initial month was hell month. We have 12 days until we move and there is so much to do still...its coming up so quick!