Friday, November 23, 2012

Another Time I Guess

Well....here i am again. By myself because not one of my friends tries to schedule something that will fit into my schedule. No one else works...they just go to their big universities and go to class, party, and chill with the new friends they make. Yeah they may work on campus...a whole maybe 10 hours a week where they can do all their homework and stuff....but that really doesn't count as work, at least to me it isn't. Work is what i do, i work 4-5 times a week, 30 hours a week, i can't do my homework, i can study cause i devised a way to do that, and it isn't always fun or easy. Aka today, wake up at 3:30 am for Black Friday, what do my friends do? Go shopping. I get outta work at 1:30, then about have a break down because i am just exhausted and containing my emotions in that state doesn't normally go well, so i go over to Deric's for an hour and a half so i can calm down and deal with the world again. I would have been a wreck if i had gone to hang with anyone....even now I'm tired, just not getting over emotional. So then i text my friends at 3:30 and ask where they are at cause they said they would be hanging out all day and i want to see them before they start their sleepover which I'm not heading to cause I'm exhausted and i gotta wake up at 5 am tomorrow and work another full shift. Guess what, they stopped hanging out till the sleepover cause some people had things they needed to do, like haircuts and stuff. So....I don't get to see my friends. Again. I don't think they understand what working with someones schedule means, probably cause none of them have worked like i have. So, I'm kinda bumbed again, disappointed, but altogether accepting.
I'm glad Deric's ok with comforting me. He just holds me and makes me feel better, and some days that is all i need. He makes me feel loved, and hes never turned me down with hanging out and always tries for me. Hes amazing. Thank you Deric, I love you.

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