That Big Black Hole You Fall Into

I'm falling deeper and deeper down the well. No motivation, no friends it seems, I am by myself most of the time. I do everything by myself now. Shopping, eating out, doing errands, going to the beach, working out....You know...it's just me in my lonely little world. It would be one thing if idk, people got sick and were puking or had an appointment they forgot about. Something legit as to why they wouldn't hang out with me. Apparently ignoring me is the best way to go....cause that's how everyone seems to do it.....It would be nice if I saw Deric more. I rarely see him as it is and now he seems to work the weekends now to so there goes that. I would love to be able to at least fall asleep with him every night.....that at least would be nice....but that isn't the case. This well gets deeper by the second